


Sins are forgiven not forgotten

by theonetosurvive



Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Avengers Tower, Daddy Issues, Depression, Friendship/Love, M/M, Self-Esteem Issues, self love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-30
Updated: 2018-03-30
Packaged: 2019-04-14 20:19:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,269
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14143773
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/theonetosurvive/pseuds/theonetosurvive
Summary: Bruce working on his issues and Tony really just wanting Bruce. Loki makes an appearance. Very rough cut just an idea I've been playing with.





	Sins are forgiven not forgotten

Sometimes I wonder why I stayed. I wonder why people keep me around. For the show or to pity me. Tony keeps me around but, only because he enjoys that I can keep up with him on an intellectual level.

Tony walks in and smiles. Offers me a water. I wave him off gesturing to the chemicals I’m working with. 

“What have you been working on all day. I thought you said you would be at the Avengers meeting this afternoon.” He looks at me knowingly. I can’t lie to him. He already knows. 

“Sorry got caught up in a project. You know how it can be. I’m sure nobody missed me to much.” I look up briefly offering the smallest of smiles trying to reassure him I’m fine. He knows better and will call me on my bullshit but I can try hoping to put this off for another day.st

He grabs my chin after I look back down and has a stern frown on his face. “Bruce, I’ve been ignoring this for months but enough, just talk to me. Please Bruce.

I look at him knowing he means well but my demons are my own. “Tony, I’m fine. It’s just been an adjustment living here at the tower and everything. I’m sorry.” Please Tony, just drop it. That’s all I can think while he puts his head in his hand and sighs.

“Bruce, I know your not fine. Just please what the hell is going on. I’m here for you. I thought you knew that after everything we have been through in the past few months.”

I grib my beaker just a little to hard and it shatters, thankfully just alcohol nothing to dangerous. “Tony, I said I’m fine!” I look at him yelling the last part. Eyes flashing green.

“Well fine, if you don’t want to talk then this is over. I’ll move my stuff to the lab on the 28th floor. Keep this one. From now on we aren’t friends and we certainly aren’t together. We are colleagues and that’s it.Fuck you Bruce. You know how hard this was for me.” Tony gives me one last meaningful look before he leaves. 

I look at the door and sigh. I feel horrible and relieved all at once. Tony made me happy but I wasn’t good for him. I suppose I’m more like my father than I thought. At least I made him leave before my temper started getting the best of me.

~*~

Sitting in an Avengers meeting 3 days later and the tension is think as butter. It would take a very hot knife to cut through this. Tony is sitting there pretending he isn’t glaring at me, Steve is trying not to look concerned, Natasha looks mildly interested in what’s going on and the rest of the team just looks on edge. Except for Clint, he looks like he couldn’t care less. When the meeting finally ends I rush off to my room. Natasha tried to grab me as I left but I didn’t want to talk. I lay on my bed staring at the ceiling again. 

“My, my and I thought I had issues.” I heard a snarky and unfortunately familiar voice on the other side of the room.

“You want another go at being smashed to a pulp cause that can be arranged Reindeer games.”

“Oh my, someone has been spending to much time with that Stark fellow I see. Perhaps, quite a bit of time, intimate time.” He leers at me trying to get to me. 

“What do you want Loki, because my patience can’t take to much of you today. I should be alerting the Avengers you’re here but I don’t feel like wasting my time as you’ll be gone the second I do. So what can I do to get you out of my room?”

Loki ponders my request, looking around the room. “Why push Stark away, he cares for you. I know you care for him.”

“Not that it’s any of your business but Tony and I have our differences and decided to part ways.”

“Is that so? I have friends in high places Banner, don’t think you can lie to me.” As he says this a clough of smoke appears and plays the scene in the lab when Tony left. I feel tears start to roll down my cheek. 

I glare at him and lunge. “How dare you? I am no good for Tony you fool. My father was an abusive asshole drunk. I could be an abusive assole and hurt Tony too. I don’t want that. Tony deserves better. So leave and get the hell out. You don’t know what the hell your talking about.” I let go out his throat and he laughs. 

“They say stones and stick will break bones but words can’t hurt. Or something to that effect. The truth is, in my experience, bones heal but the mental scare words leave can’t be undone. That being said Banner, you need to let go. I know, it’s hard. Mommy and Daddy fuck everyone up in the end. Look at Stark, Howard was no A+ parent. You found that out with the issues Tony had coming out. You all know I have daddy issues but the point is, don’t let what your father said make you think you are him. I have a great deal of respect for you Banner. You and the beast are truly a phenomenal creature. When you are ready to accept yourself, you will see life in a different light. You will want to live again. The pain never truly goes away, but somethings can heal it, like love.” He looks at me quizzically and stands. “Well I should be off, I’m actually here for a date but someone told me of your troubles and I thought I should have a word with you.”

I nod very slowly trying to process everything. “Wait, a date? With who?” 

Loki smiles “Oh no one. Just a friend of ours. Hoping he likes the red white and blue I wore just for him.” He winks and disappears in a green poof.

I blink, run my hand over my face and sigh. 

~*~

Bruce watches as Tony grabs the letter that he left tapped to his lab door.

Dear Tony,

There are no words for how truly sorry I feel. I apologize for the pain and hurt I have put you through. To be very honest, I have my own pain and hurt I need to deal with before we start again. Give me some time. If you do not wish to wait, I do understand. I will never hold that against you. I am so sorry I didn’t realize this sooner. Instead I pushed you away so much I was in denial about it myself. I love you Tony. I really do love you. Before I can commit to this love, I need to learn how to love myself. I have carried hatred and distrust towards myself my entire life that only got worse after the accident. I shouldn’t have put you through this. For that, I’m very sorry. I hope that we can at least be friends again. Start to build trust again because Tony, you're the only one in a very long time to see me first. I love you.

~Bruce

I watch as Tony puts down the letter crying. He sinks down to the floor against a lab table crying. I can’t go comfort him right now. We need time apart but maybe someday we can learn to love again.


End file.
